WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by
Emily Perl Kingsley.

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved






Contact for Dynamites:

Thank you for your cooperation, support & LOVE. xoxo
Luz Marina Sementilli, Commissioner, P.A.L. (Special Populations)
Dynamites Director
(954) 270-4455 After 3 PM.
dynamitescommissioner@palsports.org
imagineluz3d@gmail.com
www.LeagueLineup.com/plantationdynamites
"A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances but rather a person with certain set of attitudes" -Unknown



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And for those who think Welcome to Holland paints
too rosy a picture, here is:

WELCOME TO BEIRUT by Susan F. Rzucidlo
(Beginner's Guide to Autism)

"I am often asked to describe the experience of
raising a child with autism-to try and help people
who have not shared in that unique experience to
understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's
like this.."

There you are, happy in your life, one or two little
ones at your feet. Life is complete and good. One of
the children is a little different than the other
but of course, he's like your in-laws, and you did
marry into the family. It can't be all that bad. One
day someone comes up from behind you and throws a
black bag over your head. They start kicking you in
the stomach and trying to tear your heart out. You
are terrified, kicking and screaming you struggle to
get away but there are too many of them, they
overpower you and stuff you into a trunk of a car.
Bruised and dazed, you don't know where you are.
What's going to happen to you? Will you live through
this? This is the day you get the diagnosis. "YOUR
CHILD HAS AUTISM"!
There you are in Beirut, dropped in the middle of
a war. You don't know the language and you don't
know what is going on. Bombs are dropping "Life long
diagnosis" and "Neurologically impaired". Bullets
whiz by "refrigerator mother" " A good smack is all
HE needs to straighten up". Your adrenaline races as
the clock ticks away your child's chances for
"recovery". You sure as heck didn't sign up for this
and want out NOW! God has over estimated your
abilities.
Unfortunately, there is no one to send your
resignation to. You've done everything right in your
life, well you tried, well, you weren't caught too
often. Hey! you've never even heard of autism
before. You look around and everything looks the
same, but different. Your family is the same, your
child is the same, but now he has a label and you
have a case worker assigned to your family. She'll
call you soon. You feel like a lab rat dropped into
a maze.
Just as you start to get the first one figured out
( early intervention) they drop you into a larger
more complex one (school). Never to be out done,
there is always the medical intervention maze. That
one is almost never completed.
There is always some new "miracle" drug out there.
It helps some kids, will it help yours? You will
find some if the greatest folks in the world are
doing the same maze you are, maybe on another level
but a special-ed maze just the same. Tapping into
those folks is a great life line to help you get
through the day. This really sucks but hey, there
are still good times to be had. WARNING! You do
develop and odd sense of humor. Every so often you
get hit by a bullet or bomb not enough to kill you,
only enough to leave a gaping wound. Your child
regresses for no apparent reason, and it feels like
a kick in the stomach. Some bully makes fun of your
kid and your heart aches. You're excluded from
activities and functions because of your child and
you cry. Your other children are embarrassed to be
around your disabled child and you sigh. You're
insurance company refuses to provide therapies for
"chronic, life long conditions" and your blood
pressure goes up. Your arm aches from
holding onto the phone with yet another bureaucrat
or doctor or therapist who holds the power to
improve or destroy the quality of your child's life
with the stroke of a pen. You're exhausted because
your child doesn't sleep.
And yet, hope springs eternal.
Yes there is hope. There ARE new medications.
There IS research going on. There are interventions
that help. Thank God for all those who fought so
hard before you came along. Your child will make
progress. When he speaks for the first time, maybe
not until he is 8 yrs old, your heart will soar. You
will know that you have experienced a miracle and
you will rejoice. The smallest improvement will look
like a huge leap to you. You will marvel at typical
development and realize how amazing it is. You will
know sorrow like few others and yet you will know
joy above joy. You will meet dirty faced angels on
playgrounds who are kind to your child without being
told to be. There will be a few nurses and doctors
who treat your child with respect and who will show
you concern and love like few others. Knowing eyes
will meet yours in restaurants and malls, they'll
understand, they are living through similar times.
For those people you will be forever grateful. Don't
get me wrong.
This is war and its awful. There are no discharges
and when you are gone someone else will have to
fight in your place.
But, there are lulls in wars, times when the
bullets aren't flying and bombs aren't dropping.
Flowers are seen and picked. Life long friendships
are forged. You share and odd kinship with people
from all walks of life. Good times are had, and
because we know how bad the bad times are, the good
times are even better. Life is good but your life in
never normal again, but hey, what fun is normal




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DOES AUTISM OFFER SPECIAL GIFTS?

by Illana Katz

�Identify yourself,� Seth says when meeting someone new. �Oh, my deepest apologies,� he�ll tell you, his curled hand over his heart as he delivers a deep bow, if he thinks he has made some kind of error.

Sometimes his face comes very close to yours to get your attention, telling you something that just cannot wait. �I am Sethman, not Sethy,� he reminds us.

�I am an adult. Live long and prosper,� he continues, using a Spock phrase right out of �Star Trek,� talking out loud using the priestly hand gesture, arm outstretched, reminding himself that his favorite TV characters Spock and Captain Kirk are Jewish. In fact, he tells those around him that they are Jewish.

We call his phrases �Seth-isms.�

It was not that many years ago that if you told someone your child had autism they would tell you their child is artistic, too. No kidding! And what about those well-meaning people who would tell you how God chose your home to place this special soul, knowing that you would love and cherish him or her.

How could we be so lucky?

Today we would submit that Seth is probably the best thing that has ever happened to us ... or one of the best things anyway. We never have to worry about him ripping off hubcaps. A stickler for following rules, often profoundly shy (unless he knows you) he runs for the hills if he hears foul language on television. But way back when ... make no mistake about it; those early years were a real challenge.

The Seth of today is almost always a joy for us. But he�s still so very different, unique.

Seth has often been told he looks like Ben Affleck and Keanu Reeves. That has prompted him to declare that he wants to be an actor. After all, since Ben Affleck and Keanu Reeves are actors, then he should be one, too. That�s logical, isn�t it?

Twice a week he leaves the gates of his transitional program at The Help Group and strolls over to Valley College where he takes an acting class � his favorite thing to do. Popular in his class, he is often used as a straight man. And since Seth can quickly memorize lines and seems to have stage presence, why not become an actor? Stranger things have happened, maybe.

At home you will often see him playing soundtracks from movies while seemingly conducting, using his index fingers for a conductor�s baton.

�I love conducting,� he�ll tell you excitedly.

He�ll pantomime words used by comedians while staring into the mirror, all the time conducting.

Do-gooders might tell you that having a special-needs child is like taking a vacation to Hawaii and winding up in Alaska. Hogwash! Taking a vacation to Hawaii and winding up on Mars is more like it � even when you end up treasuring the results.

As we faced those challenges we gained strength from my research into the life of Albert Einstein, a very unusual human being. In 1988, I began to look into his life, having long ago heard about his quirks and thinking what oddities genius reveals. What if Einstein was like this, too? After all, Einstein�s parents had been very worried about him when he was a baby. His head was unusually large (something being studied today as many children with autism are born with unusually large heads). His grandparents thought he was a dolt. He was a late talker, did poorly in school, was a loner, solitary, suffered from major tantrums, had no friends and didn�t like being in crowds.

What if Einstein had some form of autism? After two years of research with Dr. Edward Ritvo, a highly respected child psychiatrist at UCLA who is now retired, I had come to believe Einstein did have autism. Einstein was unusual his entire life. I spoke about Einstein at autism conventions and wrote about him in my last book. If Einstein did have autism and could do what he did in spite of his autism, or, perhaps because of it, what did this mean for others diagnosed with it?

The number of people now diagnosed with autism is staggering, especially in light of the fact that, not long ago, few had even heard the word. About 1.77 million people in the United States or one out of every 33 boys (boys are diagnosed approximately four times more often than girls) or 166 people per 10,000 have autism.

What was a very rare syndrome in the 1960s is pervasive today. And the numbers keep rising.

Have you heard of Sue Rubin?

Sue is a nonverbal young woman in her mid-20s who has autism. Sue, once thought to be �severely retarded,� is nothing of the kind. Through something called Facilitated Communication, a somewhat controversial form of therapy, it was discovered that Sue was brilliant in mathematics. Sue received a hefty scholarship for college and wrote a screenplay in 2004 titled �Autism Is a World.�

What about Ben Golden?

He is a young man in his mid-30s, nonverbal and autistic. He and his family moved to Israel several years ago. Like Sue, Ben also communicates using Facilitated Communication. That is how his family came to understand just how much their son really knew. Today, people come long distances to visit with Ben. He tells them about themselves and gives them guidance. Those who visit with Ben are frequently in awe. He seems to know things about those who come to see him. Psychic? Who knows. But apparently he�s quite gifted, and his essays can be found on the Internet.

Ben, Sue, Seth � a few names of some unique special-needs people. In the grand scheme of things, maybe it is those with special needs and differences who have the answers. Wouldn�t that be something!

Illana Katz, a former staff writer for Jewish Heritage, has written six books, two of which focus on autism

http://www.jewishjournal.com/home/preview.php?id=14156





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Contact for Dynamites:
Thank you for your cooperation, support & LOVE. xoxo
Luz Marina Sementilli, Commissioner, P.A.L. (Special Populations)
Dynamites Director
(954) 270-4455 After 3 PM.
dynamitescommissioner@palsports.org
imagineluz3d@gmail.com
www.LeagueLineup.com/plantationdynamites
"A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances but rather a person with certain set of attitudes" -Unknown