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Beaconsfield Oldtimers Hockey Association
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KEVIN RACE MVP of the Week
November 4, 2009
Week 11 was a nightmare for the league’s goalies as a total of 34 goals were scored breaking the record of 32 goals established thirty eight years ago when Michael Montagano was in diaper dreaming his future as a city councilor. With diaper replaced by Fruit of the looms, life long dream realized and a landslide victory, his team celebrated for him pounding Team Green 8-1. Team Green, beginning to miss their big defenceman Mike Tinmouth more and more, was down and out early trailing 5-0 at the half. Legal counsel Glen Brown, trying to step up a notch for the team, ran into penalty troubles again and was ejected after three penalties, one deserved and the other two by reputation. Underachieving for the past five weeks, Team Green is just trying a bit too hard. A pass here and a pass there by their top players might just get them back to where they should be.
Leading 3-2 with ten minutes left, Team Red high risked defensive corps got carried away trying to score the insurance goal and backfired to a 6-4 loss as Team White rallied with six two on ½ resulting in 3 goals in five minutes.. Leading the way for Team White was their under rated winger Kevin Race, with his first career hat trick and a team record of nine shots to edge out Terry O’Neill of Team Red for the week’s MVP award. Terry O’Neill, missed by 2 votes to be MVP for the second straight week, is on a torrid pace with six goals in two games. He has 90% of the team production. Unhappy with some missing players who missed the team bus, Team Red GM, Paul Bambi Prevost issued a statement that Joe Marchildon and the Dude are suspended till the next game and will not be allowed to participate in the team’s new whiteboard strategic planning session.
Another high scoring game between Teams Gold and Blue closed out the night with Blue on top 9-6. Gold, a proud team, scored three goals in the last three minutes to make it look closer but on this night, Gord Parkinson was just too much for Gold to handle as he potted his own rebound through Pierre Lacoste five holes, who has the same Carey Price’s black clouds hanging over his shoulders. Blue, the best structured team in the league and only uses the traditional blackboard for their strategy, continues to play the possum style game and keeping pace with Team White. The two teams are threatening to run away from the rest.
Cheers,
Field Reporter
O’Neill MVP Player of The Week
October 28, 2009
In a new award created by BOHA Marketing Division, Terry O’Neill of Team Red is the first recipient of the weekly MVP player of the week. With his three goals, all garbage goals, Terry, with his line mates of Bob Roe and Dave “the Dude” Connell, squeaked out a 3-3 tie for the Red against Team Blue. Paul “Bambi” Prevost, captain of Team Red, frustrated with the team’ perimeter game, took a chance and elevated Terry’s line to the second line. With this incentive and the offensive output, Team Red now has one second line and two third lines. The defensive tandem of Gord McLennan and Joe Marchildon with his dizzying Watusi spinarama move remains Team Red top offensive line leading the team with ten shots, 0 goals and 0 assist and a minus three. Team Blue, the best structured team in the league, has now gone two games without a win prompting Team Captain Tom Simpson to recall himself and Scott Meehan back for next week’s crucial game against the up and coming Team Gold. Both were sent down by assistant captain Kurt Legler to their affiliate, the Lakeshore Peewee A, to refresh their C cut moves after their loss last week.
After experiencing a surge in the last few games, Team Black is back down to where they belong, victimized by a few call ups made by Gold’s GM Darrell Irons family. Gold’s call ups Andre Blanchette, Sean Hughes and the week’s MVP runner up, Mathieu Crevier, took advantage of a Lerouxless lineup to pump in six goals and a 6-3 win. Team Black’s Goalie, real estate mogul Keith Bertoia, was seen fuming and mumbling something about rushing to the game and missing a deal on a charming three bedroom cottage.
Team Green, touted as the team to beat three weeks ago, is now officially in a slump after missing their two heavy weight defencemen Glen Brown and Mike Tinmouth again. Nowhere to be seen was also their top gun Ken Rowe, now missing physically as well and winger Bob Bowrin, who is practicing his writing skill to get a spot with the Field Reporter Association. Team White, voted as BOHA best defensive corps, followed their game plan to the tee with their Captain Chris Wright capitalizing with his patented “sneak into the slot” move, leading the team to a 6-3 win after building up a 5-0 lead at half time.
With a third of the season completed, Team White is beginning to run away from the rest. Will they break the “Most points after 11 games” record held by Team Red of 2008-09 season who had 17 points? Will Team Red allow Team White to break the record next week?
Believe it or not ……
216 goals have been scored to date. 176 scored by call ups. Of the 40 goals scored by the roster players, 36 were classified as garbage goals.
There were 187 breakaways with 7 goals scored, all on Team Green. This report submitted by the Goaltending Union with abstention from Green’s goalie.
There were 87 five on two plays. This report submitted by BOHA Defencemen Brotherhood.
Cheers,
Field Reporter
No BOHA Trades as Trading Deadline Expires
October 7, 2009
After seven weeks and 38 visual telepathy meetings, the Balancing Committee has decided to keep the teams as they are. In a pre-game press conference, the Head member of the committee who OK’s every deal, Ted Mulhern, informed the crowded press room that the league has too many players on “No trade” clause in their contracts. All the teams will have to rely on their call ups to bolster their lineups. With the announcement over, much to the chagrin to some players who hope quietly to be traded, week seven got underway.
Team White on a six game unbeaten streak, lost their first game of the season 4-2 to Blue, who is now 17 games away from clinching first place. Without their top gun Ralph Difiore, Team Blue still dominated the game with Scott Meehan, fresh from signing a new no trade contract, stepping up to anchor and quarterbacked the blue line team of Dollard Leblanc, Robert “C cut” Ouellette and Pierre Tardif . This new Defensive corps is ready to challenge Team White, voted by the Field Reporters Association to have the league’s top D of Yves Quenneville, Claude Dubeau, Howard Gosselin and new comer Karl Boivin. Chris Wright, last year’s BOHA 2nd All Star Team D, is in the farm waiting for a chance to crack the lineup. With the loss, he might just get his chance. Blue’s new players Rep, Tom Simpson, in the one on one interview, expressed his concern that Team Blue might just be peaking a tad early and warned his players to continue with their off ice yoga conditioning program.
It was a no contest in the feature “Game of the evening” between Team Red and Team Black. Team Red had difficulties figuring out how to play Team Black “Shinny” strategy. Black came out early and peppered Team Red and a 2-0 early lead, Red came back with two quick goals to tie Black only to trail again on a slow scooter shot along the ice by Andy Leroux with 2 seconds left in the first half. It was all downhill in the second half as Black’s coach Roger Richard employed his weave in and shoots strategy resulting in rebounds galore, breakaways, 3 on ones and a bonus 5 more goals and a deserving 8-4 win. In the post game closed room meeting, Team Red Captain Paul “Bambi” Prevost asked for a solution to fix the leaky pipes and also felt that some players were figure skating and banned himself, Dan Goodale, Mike Rourke, Dave “the Dude” Connell, Doc Heseltine and Paul “Money Grabber” Painter from watching “The Battle of the Blades”.
Teams Green and Gold played the game of the night. With some call ups, Green dominated for the most part but needed all six of their top guns in the last minute with the goalie out to tie Gold 5-5. After the game, BOHA Players Development VP, Ted “Stonewall” Jackson, a distant relative of the famous Civil war Rebel, confessed to Field Reporter that he had the upper hand in the players call up selection business as they scored most of the goals for the Green. Meanwhile, Team Green first draft Ken Rowe, who earlier had to barter for a pair of pants from the Dude, felt Dude’s pants inhibited his skating style as the inseam between the legs area was a bit tight causing the Dude to express some concerns wondering if the tight inseam will affect his tool doing his new marital duties.
With week 8 just six days away, Vegas competition analysts have separated BOHA teams into two tiers. The top tier has Blue, Green and White and the bottom tier Gold, Black and Red. The odds of any of the bottom tier teams moving up to the top tier is set at 12,000 to 1 with Team Red odds set at Infinity to 1. Will Team Red rise up to the challenge? Tune in.
Cheers,
Field Reporter
BOHA Back To League Play After Successful Tournament
September 30, 2009
In the closing ceremony after a record breaking 11th consecutive successful invitational tournament, BOHA President Andy Leroux thanked the tournament CEO Terry O’Neill for a job well done and awarded him another two year extension for this well paying job. To many observant of this prestigious event, it was a flawless 5 days of great hockey, best foods and refreshments in town with the usual Friday night entertainment to cap off the highlights. At the end, when the tally is in, some of the deserving West Island charities will be the winners and BOHA members will proudly hold their heads high.
Back in league play, both Red and Gold played a cautious 1-2-2 formation game. For a while, it appears that 0-0 was going to be the score until the ensuing faceoff in the Red zone when Red’s first draft choice, Mike Rourke, who has never missed a runway, was off his lane to allow Gold’s Jeff “Jet” Jones to side swipe the puck from Paul Painter who had his heavy leaded skates on again to score on Red’s half asleep goalie. Although the zebras signaled that the puck did cross the red line, BOHA video replay machine could not capture the play as the speed of the puck was below the standard 15 mph set by the competition board. Team Red’s offensive line D, Joe Marchildon, who was criticized for his “gentlemanly” play lately, then took his famous snapper inside the blue line and followed with a pass out to deflect off JP Mayer’s skate for the tie. With a goal more from each side, the score ended in a 2-2 tie.
Team Green, touted as the favourite team to finish first by Vegas, gambled on a new formation and backfired to a 5-1 loss to Team Blue. With the game still close after 3 minutes, Team Green used their newly devised 1-0-4 formation where the designated defenceman goes in to the offensive zone while the other four stays on the blue line to wait for the puck. Team Blue, the new favourite to win it all, caught on early and used their dump out to their speedy wingers getting twenty two 3 on 1’s with Paul Regimbal involved in twenty of them. With three minutes left in the game, Team Green playing coach Neil Gargul became the first casualty in BOHA coaching fraternity when he was fired by aluminum tab collector Jack Hubert who felt that the strategy is only good for warm ups. With the game over and behind closed door, Team Green held a meeting and voted Ken Rowe to be the next game coach, who confided to his team mate and junior Field Reporter Peter McCusker that he might use the 0-0-5 formation the next game.
Team Black, who was summoned earlier by league president Andy Leroux why the team is using so many call ups, introduced to each other one more time before coming on the ice to meet Team White, who is riding on a four game winning streak. Playing with confidence never seen before, Team White went up 3-0 and started to coast. Meanwhile, Team Black became familiar with each other and led by the spirited one legged Mark Dubois, who is playing with a broken leg, Team Black began to chip away. First it was Mike Montagano goal and then new comer Greg Maloney, who skated all night to keep the Black in and a well deserved 3-3 tie.
Odds and ends ......
Already six games played and no trades yet. BOHA Balancing Committee has been meeting in the last few weeks via visual telepathy, a new technology. Field Reporter overheard that trades are hard to come by as some members of the committee have problems visualizing the players in the trade talks added by many players having one way no trade clause in their contracts.
Tune in, more to come, sooner than later.
Cheers,
Field Reporter
BOHA Welcomes 2009-2010 Season
September 23, 2009
After a four week delay in field reporting, BOHA in partnership with the Field Reporters Association announces a new format in the reporting designed to bolster the readership after months of steady decline. Down to 86 subscribers, BOHA is looking to increase its readership to its pre- refreshment cap days when 235 and 1/2 regularly visited the site. To make the reporting more player friendly, a new feature is the one on one comment from players of each team.
With the new format in place, Field Reporter begins the 2009-2010 season with a brief catch up report on the results of the past four weeks.
BOHA began its season on August 25th with the same six teams played in front of the usual capacity crowd. During the last four weeks of play, some teams won, some teams lost and some teams tied.
In the fifth week and the last game before the Balancing Committee begins to deliberate which players get traded to which teams, some team captains are instructing their players to stay under the radar.
In Game One, Team Black allowed Gold to get ahead for the first ¾ of their game before unleashing league President Andy Leroux and VP Johnny “Apple” MacIntosh, both immune to the trades as league executive, to score a few and collect the two points for Team Black with a 7-4 win. For Team Gold, their defensive game continues to struggle after losing almost all of their defence to free agency. Spiro Krallis, Team Gold’s defensive captain and the first player to do the one on one comment, confided that it is just a matter of time before the team begins to jell especially with the team’s new incentive “The Dagwood’s goal for sandwich” reward system to be unveiled in their next team meeting.
Team Green, loaded with speed and high power shooters are clearly the early favourite to win the championship this year, especially with the 2008-09 Goaltender of the year Ted “Stonewall” Jackson back between the pipes. But in this game, the pipes leaked a bit and allowed Team White to skate away with a 4-3 win. Team White, spotted Green with a three goal lead before Yves Quenneville, celebrating his 20th straight year with the same team and same number, led the comeback. Karl Boivin, Team White rookie, who signed a one way call up contract a week ago, was ecstatic after the win provided the one on one comment “ this is the best win since the last win”.
The finale game between Teams Blue and Red was a classic back and forth game. Team Red took a hard working 3-1 lead, but for the third consecutive game, has trouble holding on to it. Blue’s best forward of the twenty seventh shift, Gord Parkinson, assisted with the tying goal on his 27th shift, when his knuckle ball with top spin shot from a two on one deflected off the goalie’s glove to a waiting Brad Belvedere and an easy tap in for the 3-3 tie. Dan Gaudet, Spiro Krallis's nemesis in the perrenial market share battle as BOHA's sandwich supplier, advises field reporter in the the last one on one comment, that his R & D is working on a "Horton's double double" whammy package also to be introduced in the team next meeting.
With fifth week ended, the early Vegas odds to finish first in the standings are:
Green 3-1
Blue and White 4-2
Black 5-1
Gold 10-1
Red 16,999.9 -1
Odds and ends:
BOHA Invitational Tournament begins on Wednesday Sept. 23 to Sunday 27th. Timekeepers are in short supply for the week-end games. They need your help. This tournament raises a lot of money for charities. To date, we have donated over $350,000 to those in needs. Game times are from 5PM to midnight. Drop in and help out. There are plenty of things you can do
Cheers,
Field Reporter
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