Headlines
Subscribe to our NewsletterGentlemen,
I'll get right to it. Here are your team captains for the 2023 season:
(1) Brian Jaenicke
The fearless leader of FHMBB for 15+ years and a 4-time league champion, the former commissioner needed some coaxing to accept this great honor as he looks to sail off into the sunset with his 5th title. Don't mistake the kind smile out there. Brian can still knock 'em down from beyond the arc with the best of them and mix it up in the trenches. Cheers Skipper.
(2) Matt Carr
Ranking 1st on the very same o/u altercation leaderboard (by a staggering margin) is none other than Matt Carr. A Fair Haven legend since the mid 1990s, he has shown flashes of brilliance in this league. The question remains, which Matt Carr will show up on game day and on draft night.
(3) Navid Faryar
He is the active all-time league leader in several crucial statistical categories:
- Technical fouls
- Illicit substances ingested between the ages of 20-35
- Championships (5)
It is his hope to draft a band of like-minded, maladjusted individuals who will most likely play well for 4 games and then self-destruct.
(4) Shawn Hoagland
Having never seen a shot he didn't like, Shawn "Spider" Hoagland takes aim at his first seat in the captain's chair. Another individual who doesn't take shit off anyone, he is second on the over/under list for potential altercations this season. Let's see if he can draft a good team.
(5) Brendan Boyle
This guy always seems to be in the right place at the right time out there and is just the chillest dude. He will take a shot at drafting a winner this season. The league is very interested to see his capability as captain/GM. Give 'em hell pal.
(6) Kyle Szatkowksi
A league staple since 2006, Kyle has made his mark by staying physically fit and having a great motor. This will serve him well as his inability to make simple basketball plays (i.e making layups and bounce passes) may haunt his squad. Regardless, he is a 4-time champion and will field a team that is to be dealt with.
See you all on Friday night.
Love,
Nav
