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2016 Slo Pitch Codger League Player Registration Form

From: George Kolivoski
Hi Codger Guys,
 
We are planning on playing on Monday June 6 at 10 at 2nd & Cherry weather permitting.
Also, on Wednesday. From now until nobody wants to play in the morning.                                                                                                                                                                                  
 
Hope you can make it.

 

 

 

 

Some of you may have missed this notice in Sunday’s paper that announced the passing of Bob Dzikowski’s wife.  Bob plays on Walt’s Warriors.  Some of you may want to express sympathy at the web site.   As is our custom the Codgers will send contribution to the charity suggested in the obit notice.

 

 http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/erietimesnews/obituary-search.aspx?affiliateId=487&firstname=theresa &lastname=Dzikowski&stateid=49

 

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Don't hesitate to share.  I get lot's of emails and jokes and video from you!  I don't have time to go look for all these things, so THANKS / send me any jokes by clicking on my email address rjm5@roadrunner.com

 

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Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous. (Winston Churchill loved them).

 


1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

 

 

 

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ... but it's still on my list.

 

 

 

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

 

 

 

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

 

 

 

5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.

 

 

 

6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

 

 

 

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

 

 

 

8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

 

 

 

9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

 

 

 

10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, notify... " I answered " a doctor."

 

 

 

11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

 

 

 

12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute

 

to skydive twice.

 

 

 

13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

 

 

 

 

 

14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

 

 

 

15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

 

 

 

16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

 

 

 

17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find one now.

 

 

 

Sadly this is true!!! So.....

 

 

 

Spread the laughter, share the cheer, let's be happy, while we're here.

 

 

Dating Ads for Seniors found in a Florida Newspaper. 

 

You can say what you want about Florida , but you never hear of 

 

anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in 

 

''The Villages'' Florida newspaper. (Who says seniors don't have 

 

a sense of humor?)

 

FOXY LADY :
Sexy,fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 
80's, slim, 5'4' (used to be 5'6'),
Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion.
Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
----------------------------------------------------j
LONG-TERM COMMITMENT :
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband,
Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness,
fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.
----------------------------------------------------
SERENITY NOW :
I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and
meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together,
take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
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WINNING SMILE :
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flossier
to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
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BEATLES OR STONES ?
I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on
Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar.
If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen,
let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.
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MEMORIES :
I can usually remember Monday through Thursday.
If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads
together.
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My favorite
?

MINT CONDITION :
Male, 1932 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair,
many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves.
Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.

 

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This man was having a hard time making ends meet while getting a
modest disability check.  He thought about selling an old Indian blanket that he
inherited from his family. Watch the auction!
   

 
<http://www.youtube.com/embed/9cGlS05233Q?rel=0&iv_load_policy=3>