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TOPIC: Commissioner's Preseason Picks |
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| Commissioner
February 20, 2017
2:42:30 PM
Entry #: 4216004
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1. Surf Cowboys: This year’s version of the Surf Cowboys just has too much talent and chemistry not to win Ole Pickov’s fourth BBL title. The only thing I can see stopping this team is injuries and the second shift.
Fortunately for the rest of the league, these players have a history of just that. Ole Pickov, Bruce and White Curry are just one wrong twist from derailing this team. Kenneth’s foot wrecked BVM’s title hopes last season and sent him crashing to the second overall pick of the following draft. Bruce hasn’t exactly been hitting the gym this winter unless you count him coaching one of his sons’ 17 HYAA teams, and Pickov’s gate looks a lot like John Wayne walking in the room – still pretty scary if he gets his hands on you, but you now think you can out run his grasp. The key to this team’s success, however, is Michael O’Rouke, who has all the tools but sometimes he needs those tools to work the night shift instead of performing on the basketball court. I’m putting a call into his boss as soon as I’m done with this preseason write up.
Needless to say, it’s Surf Cowboys title to lose. I’m not betting against any team with Kenneth at the scoring helm. The guy is too good and he should never have been let in the league. He suckered me with his nice guy, “awe shucks” personality in pickup. Then he unleashed this evil alter ego that dropped 28 points in my face last season to knock the Chumps out of the playoffs.
If someone has some dirt on this “great guy” please let me know. Looking for an illegal tax shelters or a video of him stealing candy from of a child’s hand. Anything scandalous that will allow the BBL Commission to employ the, “in the best interest of the league,” policy to ban this big-time scorer and give us little guys a chance to win a title. That, or let me have the No. 1 pick next season.
Until then, Surf is the favorite. I know Pickov doesn’t like hearing that his team is the favorite, but it’s true. If you don’t like that moniker than you shouldn’t have drafted Kenneth. At least the Motherland is happy for now.
2. Chumps: Reggie in the fourth round? Are you kidding me? The Chumps took a page out of the KMR championship handbook and took incredible value with the fourth pick. Reggie, Matt Heagle and Zack are a nice trio to build around. But I can tell the whole league is thinking, “How is Hunt going to screw the team up this season?” It should be easy to do if Reggie tries to silence his critics and put the scoring burden on his shoulders. But if Reggie uses his teammates to carry the load, he could be a triple double waiting to happen. The Chumps have size with Zack and Brian Tolleson. They also have shooters with the two Heagles and Tim Bishop so teams can’t zone up Reggie. What’s for sure this season is, however, it can’t get any worse than the Chumps’ one-win season last fall.
3. BVM: Too many CEO’s not enough foot soldiers. That’s the one thing that could keep this team from winning the BBL title. Is this Dontino’s team? Is it Metrolina’s team? Is this Vince’s team to coach? Will Montenari listen to any of them? How will this team play? There is a lot to figure out.
On the bright side, BVM has plenty of shooters to put around the Vanwingerden Monster. Tony Montenari and the Vanwingerden CEO bring toughness and 3-point range. Vince and Kelly Miller can knock down a three and play defense, too. There is also no doubt that the Vanwingerden Moster will protect the pain and grab every rebound in sight.
But is the pressure of owning back-to-back No. 1 picks in the draft too much for Dontino to handle. Rumor is this young GM is already cracking under the pressure. Dontino shocked BBL GM’s when he passed on his first pick last year in White Curry and chose Michael Vanwingerden instead. Was it the right move? Some say that Dontino was upset with Kenneth for playing on the night before the BBL championship game and getting injured. Dontino still hasn’t let it go.
Since then, Dontino has gone through a major identity crisis leading him to change his look week after week. First Dontino’s wearing a beard. Then, he’s going for rock-star long hair. Now he’s chopped it all off for a cleaner look. This GM is suffering from decision fatigue knowing he’s had the No. 1 pick for three months. He’s even forgotten what made him a double-double machine in the BBL and settled for a life on the perimeter? After winning a 3-point shooting competition in Denny’s league, he’s launching 3-point shots any chance he gets in pick up. Any time he gets near the lane he starts muttering to himself like a homeless man in an alleyway. Some say he’s hearing voices now. One voice whispers in Vince’s voice, “Roll after you set the screen and I will pass it to you.” Another voice sounds like Montenari saying, “What are you doing shooting my 3-point shots. Get back down low!” A third voice sounds like Vanwingerden CEO telling him, “Go back to the huddle. I’ll handle those refs.” It’s like the scene in the movie, “Being John Malcovich” where all the Malcovich characters are talking at the same time.
Did Dontino over think this one? I can’t put this team on top of the BBL preseason poll when it already has a major identity crisis.
4. No Mercy: I feel like we’ve seen this story before. No Mercy loading up on talented offensive players in the draft, headed up by scoring machine David Williams. Next, they outscore teams to take the No. 1 seed entering the playoffs and then when it has to win three playoff games in a row … well … tick, tick, tick, Boom!
But could this be the most talented offensive team Maggs has ever had? Could Magg’s stubbornness to draft team that looks great on paper and ignore chemistry players payoff this season? We’ll find out. With Williams, Eric, Smitty and Maggs, this team will score early and often. I see No Mercy flirting with the 100-point mark. But how many four-on-David Hahl transition baskets before David asks, “Hey, why am I the only guy getting back on defense? Screw this!” How long before Jaime Craig says, “I lost 30 pounds just so I could play three minutes a game?” When does Brad Morton say, “I would rather suffer through another miserable season playing for the Chumps?”
But the biggest headache this team will cause this season is the agonizing, head splittin’ pain No Mercy will put in the heads of Al and Wendel. No Mercy will attack the refs from so many angles the refs won’t be able to see straight. First, Maggs will grunt and groan for a foul at Al, while Williams will passive-aggressively take out Wendel. Hahl will then just take his mouthpiece out and stare at the officials until the pee their shorts in fear. If that doesn’t work, Maggs will send in the finisher – a man who doesn’t care about fouling out of the biggest of playoff games. Eric Trivette will demolish anything left behind by his teammates.
Tick, Tick, Tick…
5. Godfather: You can never tell what Godfather is going to look like before the season starts. They either look like the alpha male Sonny Corleone or his weasel brother Fredo. The point is, however, they also get eliminated short of a BBL title. One season they look unbeatable but get shot up in finals like Sonny in a tollbooth. The next, they suffer the death of a spineless snitch begging for mercy in the first round. So which team did GM tommy draft this season? Hard to tell.
Godfather is the polar opposite of the high-scoring No Mercy. If they can find a way to score points, this defensive minded team could be dangerous. I see them winning a lot of games in the 30-point range. The reason I don’t have them higher is that they are asking a lot on offense from inconsistent scorers. Sure, Davis, Brantley and Stiglitz can make you look foolish on any given play. Sure they can drop 25 points on your head on any given night. But these guys have never done it for eight games straight, yet three playoff games in a row (oh no, here’s comes a Brantley rant about dropping 30 points a game in Paul’s league!).
This team is going to be a headache to play. You are going to have to grind it out to win. The chemistry looks strong enough for consideration as a BBL title contender, but they are going to have to find enough offense to deliver Godfather’s first championship in BBL history.
6. Air Raid: The defending Champion Air Raid returns with “F*&^ You! Money” after winning the franchise’s first BBL title last season. No matter what happens this spring, Kocher always has a BBL championship to keep his critics quiet (just ask Raz, right!). Since Kocher is playing with house money, he decided to double down on his reputation as a GM. He didn’t draft a single player from last year’s championship team. He couldn’t get Michael again but passed on Art, Lee, Clayton, Jaime and Smitty from last season’s squad. If he wins the title this season, then he lets everyone know that the only common denominator to back-to-back titles is GM Kocher. If he loses, well, “F$(% You! I won last season!” He can’t lose in this situation.
That being said, I don’t like his draft as much as others (then again, that worked out well for him last season). Air Raid isn’t the biggest team in the league this year. Fink is the lone big man and he’s coming off the bench. He will also have to trade in his windup three-point shot for a post game. That and hit the gym for 5 sets of 5 reps on chest day. Fortunately for Air Raid every day is chest day for the top heavy Fink. What I do like about Kocher’s draft is that he grabbed some knock down shooters to stretch the floor for stat stuffer Scott Rogers to operate. The heady Jay Barnes and David Craig – a man who celebrates 3-point shots whether he makes them or air balls them – can stretch the floor. So can Kocher and Cliffy.
Will it be enough?
If Fink can hold down the middle and Cliffy can keep this squad glued together, Air Raid has a chance at the title. No doubt they will be playing that underdog card hard this season. I just think they don’t matchup well with a few teams like BVM and it’s Vanwingerden Monster. Don’t expect back-to-back Air Raid titles.
7. Raz: Have you ever seen a washed up celebrity selling his dignity for a shiny payday? I’m thinking Shaq selling auto insurance for the General or William Shatner peddling for Priceline.com.
That’s my first impression of KMR this season. In the past, Raz was a shrewd drafter taking other team’s trash and making them into treasures. This season, however, KMR took a different approach. Raz sold out and drafted his NASCAR buddies. He took Brooks, JP, Matt Browning, Michael Fawley, Jason Wilkes and Rob McKinney – all players who work in NASCAR or play in Denny Hamlin’s NASCAR basketball league. We’ll call this draft the NASCAR package. Oh wait … Browning doesn’t have a NASCAR connection, you say? Of course he does. Does anyone look more like a NASCAR fan tailgating outside Talladega Superspeedway than Browning? Just watch Browning warm up up before a BBL game and you’ll see what I mean. He’s barefoot and wearing a t-shirt that he cut the sleeves off with dull scissors. His whole look screams NASCAR. Let’s call this team what it really is … a desperate attempt to infiltrate the inner circle of rich NASCAR drivers.
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| art
February 21, 2017
9:09:12 AM
Entry #: 4216035
| I just talked to my vegas insider and here is how he sees the season opening odds for the championship. remember, these are his rankings, I think BVM is the best team but that's my opinion :)
1- No Mercy 3/1 - I tried to tell him that No Mercy invents ways to lose but he wouldn't listen
2- Surf 4/1 - a lot of firepower on offense, no doubt, but can they stay healthy
3- BVM 9/2- inside and outside game are good. will they ride the hot guy every game?
4- Chumps 6/1- as usual, the commish overranks his team. If Reggie plays like he can play, watch out.
5- Godfather 8/1- Will they score more than 50 in any game this year?
6- Air Raid 50/1 - They won last year, what else can you say?
7- KMR 75/1 - As usual, Raz drafts a team that no one thinks will do anything but will they?
My guy says he will update these every 2-3 weeks
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