1. Orange

Here we have the most underrated team in the league. This team is made up of 100% walking buckets. Starting it off with captain Will Engel an absolute menace on the court with zero flaws. Then we got co-captain Brandon “I lift weights btw” Coe, who is a great shooter and a force to reckon with in the paint. Then we got Nick “Should have gone third overall” Derubeis, who I expect nothing but triple doubles all season from. Following Nick is Ben “heart over height” Bacdayan, who is a rebound machine. This dude was a steal in the second and will be a problem for opposing teams. Jesus “did you know I box?” Segura is up next. I’m not sure what to expect from him, but he can be pretty scrappy so I have high hopes but low expectations. Then we got Greyson “I only drafted him cuz his name looked cool” Bayer, followed by Nate “this dudes sister is Ellie” Rising. Nate is a reigning champ, and is apparently a good shooter, so I have high hopes for him as well. Then we got Will “never heard of him” Closser. No expectations from this guy cuz idk who he is. Then we got the two freshmen: Peter “laziest mf I know” Engel, and Garrett “this dude can’t be good” Zeigler. I thought Garrett was a good pick at first, but then I realized he was a golfer.

2. Gold

            The 2 spot goes to Gold. This has to be the most annoying team of all time. Max “Big mouth” Mandler and Jack “Chad” Urban have to be the gayest captain duo in the league. Can back it up with playing good ball, though. Next we got Alex “Handsome” Jones, he’s got a great shot and an all around baller. Then we got Jackson “Jack” Howe. I love Jack Howe but I don’t know Jackson. I heard he’s pretty good. Up next we got Ethan “I don’t rock” Rocks. This guy is tall asf but is total du du at basketball. Next we got Aidan “X-factor” Houck. This guy will come out of nowhere and bang a couple 3’s in your face, dude is a maniac. Then we got Ryan “Not the band kid” Higgs. Heard this kid is decent, we’ll see as the season goes on. Lastly we got Aaron “Cut from every basketball team” Brody. Homie is a dude and will make some sick shots all over the court, he might be better than Max.

3. Carolina

           The depth on this team is arguably the best in the league. To start we got Rob “Big bank🍑” Henricks and Ridge “Lexi’s bitch” McClintock. Solid duo right here, and will win games with their high basketball IQ and clutch 3 pointers. Next we got Brady “I’ll never stop talking” Bartusiak. This is a great pick. He’s a shutdown defender and will be aggressive in the paint. Next we got Jack “Ben’s padawan” Meyers. Dude is fast asf but you don’t kick the ball in this sport so it’s hard to tell whether he’ll be good or not. Next we got Zack “Freak on Tik tok” Ehasz. Heard he’s a good player but is one weird dude. So there’s that. Last two I know are Baden “Mitch” Friday and Marshall “Peter’s friend” Howe. If these young guys can be somewhat average along with Brady, Ridge, and Rob doing their thing, watch out for this team.

4. Charcoal

This team is the definition of a one man show. The captain’s Jake “Who’s he talking to now?” Casey and Josh “Rager” Brufsky. Jake will score, Bruf will pass to Jake and/or fight someone. Next we got Brandon “unbearably horny” Liokareas. Could be a pretty good player on this team, has good size and is a decent athlete. Next we got Josh “Lax guy” Howard. Dude is surprisingly athletic and could probably dunk if that lax hoodie he’s always wearing didn’t weigh him down. Next we got Matt “Josh” Russel. Heard this guy was a terrible pick but he’s a nice dude so I hope he’s good. Then we got Nick “Big teeth” Tanner. He’s a good soccer player but the only dude to transfer that over to basketball is Ben so idk about Nick. Then we got Drew “The Brew” Blodgett. He’s aggressive for sure but doesn’t have that great of a shot. He’ll be good to get a board and pass it to Jake. Then we got Bennet “Kicker” Henderson and Nico “Liv” Amatangelo. I actually know who these people are, but unfortunately I don’t know much about their basketball skills. It’ll be interesting to see this team play. I mean Jake.

5. Purple

This team is really hard to predict. You could say they’re unpredictable. The captains include Gavin “I finally grew” Fitzpatrick and Ryan “Sniffles” Mckeever. Good duo right here, again hard to predict because of inconsistency but overall pretty strong duo. First we got Charlie “Grace 😍” Eberly. Not only is this an amazing guy, he’s a pretty good basketball player. Excited to see what this dude does this year. Next we got Jack “Totally opposite of Brandon” Shearer. Could be a good player but his injuries proneness will hinder his abilities for sure. Next we got Dexter “Only lives for rec basketball” Stamm. I swear anytime someone brings up rec basketball the name Dex is brought up. Heard he ain’t too bad. Next we got Charlie “Favorite QB” Stohl. This man is an amazing QB. Maybe it’ll transfer over to the basketball court and throw dimes to Ryan or Fitz. Next we got Quinn “Fridge” Fitzpatrick. Dude is a unit and definitely will be a force to be reckoned with in the paint. I like this team a lot. Could be very dangerous.

6. Maroon

Coming in at 6 is Maroon, led by Franco “restaurant guy” D’Amico and Triston “back pains“ Schaffer. Frank isn’t bad, and Triston is a tall dude with a good shot. However, Tristons apparent injury is holding his team back. Jake “I can’t tell if I like or hate this guy” Howard is pretty good at basketball so he was a good pick. Then they got Tyson “chicken” Swigart, who is pretty athletic so he's probably an OK pick. Then there is Johnny “stick to baseball” McShane is expected to be good, but won’t make an impact for this team. Cole “my sister is more athletic than me” Lang is not a good basketball player, but is definitely a nice guy. Then there is Landon “York Patties” York, who won’t do anything for this team. David “simp” Goldberg will be a bust of a pick up, and I don’t see anything good coming from him. Finally, Tanav “four eyes” Dandekr, I’ve heard, is a high school Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Good pick up.

7. Royal

I think this team is the sauciest team in the entire league. We’ve got Tucker “Cocky” Neal and Nikita “Magicman” Knobel as captains. These guys will pull all of the moves on you and make their shots 65% of the time. Next we got Eddie “QB prospect” Albert. I’ve seen this guy shoot, he’s total money from the perimeter. Next we got Matt “Team player” Haverlack. Matt is the most unselfish player on this team, and in the entire league. He wants to win basketball games, and it’s obvious through his passing game and smart decision making. Next we got Nick “Gibberish” Chimento. This man will get all the rebounds on this team, and will lead the league in them. He surprisingly has a decent shot, but not from beyond the free throw line. Next we got Tyler “Dad” Super. Soup is the biggest dad in the league, and will drain a couple 3’s in your face and roast you with his fine use of words. Lastly we got Mike “Stonks” Menard. Not only is this guy aggressive in the stock market, he’s also very aggressive on the court, and will be a big time defender for this team. 

8. Cardinal

Man, I love this team so much. I’m the biggest Cardinal Red enthusiast ever. Can it be Orange versus Cardinal Red in the championship? Would love to see that. The captains Connor “No leg day” Schmitt and Jordan “I’m too good for highschool basketball” Kweder. The dynamic of these captains is unreal. Height and power paired with speed and skill. Next we got Koby “Kobe” Markovitz. This guy might be the best 3 point shooter and in the entire league along with Robbie Henricks. Can’t wait to see him play. Next we got Gordon “Gordo” Groninger. Decent football player but i don’t know much about his basketball skills. I’m sure it was a good pickup. Next we got Hunter “Tryhard” Hanna. This man is a sweat in literally everything he does so i’m sure he’ll be a contributor to this team. Next we got Hunter “Shrek” Schroeck. Maybe he’ll go full ogre and score a lot of points. I don’t know the correlation ogres and scoring but bare with me. The only other kid I know on the team is Cole “Tyler” Super. Cole’s brother, Tyler, is the best human being on this planet. So maybe Cole will be good because he’s always in the presence of Tyler Super. Let’s go Cardinal Red! (Not against Orange, of course).

9. Kush

Here at 9 we have Kush Green, led by Gavin “Yev” Wyland who can definitely put up some points but is overall just not the best player ever. Co-captain Cyrus “I forgot about that guy” Khani is a pretty athletic guy, but I don’t think I can see him making any great plays on this Kush team. Up next is Billy “yes I injured my shoulder again” Salapow, who is a walking bucket. This dude can ball, and will be the focal point for this team. Then they have Liam “7 '7” Szajnecki who can’t play basketball but should be good for a few rebounds, and maybe some layups. Donavon “I run like I shit my pants” Kohler is the talk of the league and should be one of this team's best players. Up next is Nik “I can’t play basketball but I can do a backflip” Cagni, who won’t be able to score but a backflip would be equally as cool. They drafted Evan “shorter than my 5 year old cousin” Taylor, who is extremely fast but can’t make a bucket. I’m not sure who Breyden Lucas is, but his name sounds cool so maybe he’s good. Finally, we have “Boss” Mikey B, who is undoubtedly one of the worst players in rec history. 

10. Navy

Led by Dom “dude dude dude!” Egizio, who can ball, and Aedon “short dude” Moss, this team is destined to fail. Zach “shouldn’t have gone third overall” Fairfull can ball, but is as clumsy as it gets. Jacob “Huff” Hufnagel is athletic and is apparently pretty good, so he was a good pick. Then they have Aaron “absolute beast” Lattner and Jacob “your team already lost” Lucas, who are like yin and yang. This duo will be dangerous on the court. Followed by Daniel “crybaby” Seewald, who sucks at this sport, is David “smallest dude in the league” Dedes, who will have at least 5 of his shots blocked per game. Then we have Alex “no one has ever heard of me” Tindale and Drake Wrangler, who is someone I am also unfamiliar with.

11. Scarlet

This team is cursed with having Drew “The turkey bowl is why I’m alive” Conwell, who is one of the most unathletic kids I’ve ever seen, but can make the most ridiculous shots ever. His co-captain Ethan Hancock is pretty decent, but is too short to carry. Their first pick was Mateo “ween” Cepullio who is very athletic but is the most streaky player of all time. Then they got Connor “definitely irish” O’Neil, who may surprise us this year. Then there is Marcus “gummy” Fennell who is a great guy but I can’t speak on his basketball abilities. Danny “money” Murphy is a bucket and a half. Jake “anger issues” Zeh, is OK but will not be able to put up points for this team. I’ve never seen Simon “boring dude” Andres play basketball but I can’t imagine he’s anything special. Finally there is Sammy Moss and Jan Sames, who I’ve never heard of, which isn’t a good thing. 

12. White

At deadlast on our list we have White, who is led by “Swampy” Sam Phillips and his co-captain “Lanky” Kristian Karidis. These two captains will be the downfall to this team. Sohum Shankar went first overall to this team, which was a good pick. This dude is a bucket. Following, they picked Zain “musical guy” Aizooky, who I heard is pretty good. Then we got Andrew “band kid” Higgs, who cannot possibly be good. Kyle Kerber I heard is pretty decent, but can be locked up easily. Then we have a band of kids I’ve never heard of, including Joey Lucca, Jaden Kitheart, Noah Wagner, Jack Deitrick. This team won’t succeed and it’s because of Sam and Kristian.