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Author |
TOPIC: Joke |
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| Anthony
April 6, 2006
5:40:59 PM
Entry #: 1368667
| A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train cause we're going down the tracks!"
The mother went nuts and told her son, "We dont use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language."
Two hours later, the sone comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking from the train, please remember to take all your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."
As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."
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| Derek D
April 7, 2006
1:57:58 PM
Entry #: 1370552
| couldn't resist this one:
Two men are talking in the bar sharing their sob stories. One man says, "I had the worst Freudian slip the other day."
The other man responds, "What the hell is a Freudian slip?" "You know," says the first man. "It's when you mean to say one thing, but you say something else that reveals what you are really thinking about.
Like the other day I was at the airport, and this really sexy lady was helping me. Instead of asking her for 'two tickets to Pittsburgh,' I asked her for 'two pickets to Tittsburgh." The second replies, "Oh, now I know what you are talking about. It's like the other day when I was having breakfast with my wife. I wanted her to pass me the orange juice, but instead I said, 'You ruined my life, bitch!'"
good luck to all representing on sunday!
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| Amer
April 7, 2006
2:06:23 PM
Entry #: 1370576
| Alright fine...I'll add one in here...
A rich white man threw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbors, including Leroy, the only black guy in the neighborhood. He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion. Everyone was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating BBQ and flirting with the women. At the height of the party, the host said, "I came home from a business trip and I found a 10 foot alligator got in my pool and I can't find anybody who will come and take him away. I'd give a million dollars to anyone who would do the job!" The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool! Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its ass! He was jabbing it in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, head butts and chokeholds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping it through the air like some kind of Kung-Fu master. The water was churning and splashing in the struggle. Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the surface. He slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was staring in disbelief. Finally the host says, "Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars." "I don't want it," said Leroy, panting. The rich man said, "Leroy, I have to give you something! You won the bet." Leroy said, "I would be satisfied if you gave me the name of whichever one of these white motherf**kers it was that pushed me in the pool."
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| Joey J
April 7, 2006
4:18:29 PM
Entry #: 1370951
| While we're at it...
A guy, let's call him Nolan, walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc, I gotta problem". The doctor says "what's going on?" Nolan says, "well, I wake up in the morning to my girl shaking me and begging for sex. So I give it to her. Then I car pool to work with my neighbor's wife. She's a total freak, and she blows me on the way to work. Then I get to work, walk into the copy room, and every damn day my boss's secretary follows me in there and she wants me right then and there. So BAM, I take care of it on the copy machine. Then, I go workout with a trainer at lunchtime, and I nail her in the sauna after we work out. Then, I come home from work and the maid is there, on all fours cleaning, and I ravage her from behind. After all that, my girl wants it again before bed." So the doc says, "Let me get this straight, you bang your girl in the morning, get a BJ on the way to work, nail your boss's secretary on the copy machine, screw your trainer, screw your maid while she's cleaning, then give it to your girl again before bed?!? What the hell is the problem?!?" Nolan says, "it hurts when I jack off".
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| Joey J
April 7, 2006
4:21:19 PM
Entry #: 1370965
| Got that one from Dennis. I've been telling everyone. For some reason, girls don't ever seem to laugh.
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| Nate Dogg
April 7, 2006
4:54:04 PM
Entry #: 1371066
| Man I hate Nolan, well at least I can .......damn it.
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| eno keno
April 8, 2006
4:28:31 PM
Entry #: 1372451
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| Puney
April 14, 2006
8:28:55 AM
Entry #: 1383916
| Hey i want to add a joke as well......Team Orange
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| Amer
April 17, 2006
1:02:12 PM
Entry #: 1388276
| Joey K....what's your email address??
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| Amer
April 17, 2006
1:03:15 PM
Entry #: 1388278
| JAB...what's urs??
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